Lost my Dad last night

milom98 said:
Wasn't unexpected because he's been on a decline for a while now but there's still no way to prepare yourself for something like it. He's going to be a huge loss for our family. Him and my Mom were married for 60 years this year and she is going to be completely lost without him. She's not in good health, so it's probably going to be a short grieving period and then focusing on her well being.

We couldn't talk politics but I'd give anything to argue with him about it this morning.

You don't think about the true meaning of never until something like this happens and then it hits you like a ton of bricks.

Thanks for letting me express myself here.
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I can identify with where you are. My dad died after a year of declining from a brain tumor. My parents were married for over 50 years and my mom was totally lost without him and in poor mental health and died three years later.

Grieving my dad's death yet focused on my mom's well being was the most sad and stressful 3 years of my 73 years.

I am with you my brother and please know you are in my heart🙏
 
My condolences for your loss.

Like someone else in this thread, I lost my father about 2 1/2 years ago. It does get better over time, but I still miss talking to him. Like yours my parents were married for 60+ years, and many things are difficult for my mom just because there are so many decisions/activities that would simply been taken care before and no longer are. Those unmade decisions serve as a regular reminder of your loss. Just be there for your mom as much as you can. I don't know if you have siblings or not, but my experience is that the transition from your father being the head of the family might change your sibling relationships somewhat (some good, some not so good).
 
Watching one's parents in decline is sobering, and challenging in terms of demands of meeting their everyday needs. Not everyone had a good relationship full of happy memories, especially around holiday and family gatherings, but if you did, consider yourself fortunate and lucky and take solace in that. Sounds like you can. Lost my Dad suddenly in an automobile accident when I was 10, now 56 years ago and counting, but had a strong mother who pulled our family through it. Now eight years since her passing and you never quit missing them, though the memories certainly fade...Peace to you and your family.
 
I would be all in for Medicare-or someone-to have "classes" at Community Colleges ,( University, HS -whatever) in "Elder Care " I don't mean as a profession, I mean just for the avg person that may have to deal with this one day.
I had a perfectly nice family of origin, but we were pretty damn stoic on such matters. And I "could have done better ". I was always pretty good at showing up-but sometimes I was more worthless than I could have been. I got impatient on occasion-and my parents saw it and sometimes it hurt their feelings .
The odds are pretty good-usually in your 60s-we are all needing to take care of our parents at some level .
 
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