Mental health...

  • Thread starter Thread starter UNCatTech
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Take things one day at a time. Be aware of the potential outcomes, but don't dwell on them. Focus on the positives. Talk to her as much as you can, even if she can't hear you in the moment, and tell her you love her.
 
She is doing better today. She was active earlier, but they gave her a mild sedative because she was messing with the ventilator tube. The doctors hope to remove the ventilator today.
A patient messing with the ventilator tube is not an uncommon thing. Praying for your daughter Tech.
 
A patient messing with the ventilator tube is not an uncommon thing. Praying for your daughter Tech.
Yes, not uncommon. I had to have an emergency surgery (after childbirth, no less) and woke up on a vent -- didn't quite understand what was happening and kept trying to take it out. Had to have restraints until I regained normal consciousness.

I'm so sorry that you've having to go through all of this, what an incredibly stressful experience for you and your family. I hope that there is continued improvement today...
 
Just have to say the mental health system in the US needs a lot of change. I know a family who has had to deal with severe mental issues with their daughter. She has been violent and has threatened to kill her parents and siblings. The parents have tried time and time again to get her help, but everywhere they take her they are told she is fine and she needs to go home. But she isn't fine and they don't feel safe with her in the house, and they have to protect the other kids, too. They have taken her to hospitals and other mental health facilities, and have been threatened with child protective services taking all the kids from them if they didn't come pick her up and take her home because she was "fine."
 
Many of you know of the struggles my middle daughter has delt with over the last 14 years.

She seemed to be doing well but recently she hasn't been doing as well and the treatments seem to be less effective.

I am currently in the ICU waiting for the doctor to finish a test so I can go back and see her.

I'm very worried and really don't know what to do.
Sorry to hear that buddy. I will keep y'all in my prayers.
 
Just have to say the mental health system in the US needs a lot of change. I know a family who has had to deal with severe mental issues with their daughter. She has been violent and has threatened to kill her parents and siblings. The parents have tried time and time again to get her help, but everywhere they take her they are told she is fine and she needs to go home. But she isn't fine and they don't feel safe with her in the house, and they have to protect the other kids, too. They have taken her to hospitals and other mental health facilities, and have been threatened with child protective services taking all the kids from them if they didn't come pick her up and take her home because she was "fine."
My wife has a patient like this. Mom is out of her mind, because one of her violent kids wakes up at night and wanders through the house threatening them. Child protective services says that the parents should hire someone to sit up at night, basically a night guard for the whole house. As if it's safe to *have strangers in your house while you sleep at night**

My wife also has patients who dump their kids in the ER and refuse to come get them.

It's not only the mental health system that is culpable here. It's also the inflexibility of child protective services. But this gets us back to an old problem in law and policy: discretionary rules are only as good as the people who make them. The more discretion you give to case workers to make exceptions in severe cases like this, the more likely it will be that the case workers will make bad decisions. They are not Nobel Prize winners. I don't mean that as a slight; they are good people who do an exceedingly hard job, and they typically have at least a college degree, and they aren't bums or idiots. But they are also in that job for a reason.

When you give case workers the discretion to alter the rules, that's how kids fall through the cracks. You're probably familiar with the horror stories of kids who were repeatedly placed with extremely abusive parents or other guardians, exposed to drugs and crime from young age, until they either commit some horrible crime themselves or are killed/severely injured. Those kids are what happens when the rules are too flexible. When the rules aren't flexible enough, you get the situation you describe.

This is why law and policy is very hard. The people who say, "I could figure this out in an hour with my common sense" have no fucking idea what is involved or required. In general, there is always a flexibility tradeoff. Even the court system struggles with this in terms of discretion given to judges. It's always the same issue: too much flexibility leads to abuses; too much rigidity leads to absurd outcomes.
 
Just have to say the mental health system in the US needs a lot of change. I know a family who has had to deal with severe mental issues with their daughter. She has been violent and has threatened to kill her parents and siblings. The parents have tried time and time again to get her help, but everywhere they take her they are told she is fine and she needs to go home. But she isn't fine and they don't feel safe with her in the house, and they have to protect the other kids, too. They have taken her to hospitals and other mental health facilities, and have been threatened with child protective services taking all the kids from them if they didn't come pick her up and take her home because she was "fine."
I know the system is a struggle. One also has the insurance and cost constraints. Unfortunately we've been navigating this for over a decade. It never gets easier, but some facilities and some insurance does actually work. The family has to keep pushing.
 
My wife has a patient like this. Mom is out of her mind, because one of her violent kids wakes up at night and wanders through the house threatening them. Child protective services says that the parents should hire someone to sit up at night, basically a night guard for the whole house. As if it's safe to *have strangers in your house while you sleep at night**

My wife also has patients who dump their kids in the ER and refuse to come get them.

It's not only the mental health system that is culpable here. It's also the inflexibility of child protective services. But this gets us back to an old problem in law and policy: discretionary rules are only as good as the people who make them. The more discretion you give to case workers to make exceptions in severe cases like this, the more likely it will be that the case workers will make bad decisions. They are not Nobel Prize winners. I don't mean that as a slight; they are good people who do an exceedingly hard job, and they typically have at least a college degree, and they aren't bums or idiots. But they are also in that job for a reason.

When you give case workers the discretion to alter the rules, that's how kids fall through the cracks. You're probably familiar with the horror stories of kids who were repeatedly placed with extremely abusive parents or other guardians, exposed to drugs and crime from young age, until they either commit some horrible crime themselves or are killed/severely injured. Those kids are what happens when the rules are too flexible. When the rules aren't flexible enough, you get the situation you describe.

This is why law and policy is very hard. The people who say, "I could figure this out in an hour with my common sense" have no fucking idea what is involved or required. In general, there is always a flexibility tradeoff. Even the court system struggles with this in terms of discretion given to judges. It's always the same issue: too much flexibility leads to abuses; too much rigidity leads to absurd outcomes.
Agree. In Ga they have the 1013 law. I understand that it was out into place to protect people who are not in the state of mind to protect themselves, but it's not enough. It only requires that the patient be involuntarily Connie's to a treatment facility for a minimum of 72 hours. The problem is at least half of these counters are nothing more than babysitting services and do little to nothing to help the person start on an actual path to recovery. Some of them are so bad they make the person worse.

My daughter was given narcotics at one of these "patient care centers".
 
So, I just met the person that saved my daughter's life.

He's a manager for the same company she works for. Super nice guy. He's really helping out, starting the company paperwork for her leave of absence, etc.

Sort of a sad story. He lost a friend recently. So, maybe he was on high alert, but he also seemed to be very in tune to these issues.

He had talked with her after work Sunday night. Then he texted her just to check up on her. Must have been minutes after she took the pills. She texted back a picture of the empty bottle. He drove to her house and took her to the ER. I am so very thankful for people like this. People who listen and understand others. People who are willing to help and aware. I've been very lucky in my life to have some similar type people and I'm thankful for all of them.

When he got her to the ER she was still functional, so they were able to give her the charcoal treatment to make her throw up. I don't even want to think about where we would be right now had he not thought to check up on her.

We had spoken with her earlier in the evening and she seemed fine, same with her wife.
 
So, I just met the person that saved my daughter's life.

He's a manager for the same company she works for. Super nice guy. He's really helping out, starting the company paperwork for her leave of absence, etc.

Sort of a sad story. He lost a friend recently. So, maybe he was on high alert, but he also seemed to be very in tune to these issues.

He had talked with her after work Sunday night. Then he texted her just to check up on her. Must have been minutes after she took the pills. She texted back a picture of the empty bottle. He drove to her house and took her to the ER. I am so very thankful for people like this. People who listen and understand others. People who are willing to help and aware. I've been very lucky in my life to have some similar type people and I'm thankful for all of them.

When he got her to the ER she was still functional, so they were able to give her the charcoal treatment to make her throw up. I don't even want to think about where we would be right now had he not thought to check up on her.

We had spoken with her earlier in the evening and she seemed fine, same with her wife.
Wow. That guy is a hero.
 
Dang, atTech, I'm sorry to hear things are this rough but glad that it looks like things may be alright.

If there's anything you and your family need, I'm sure this board would be glad to help, if we can, just let us know.
 
Dang, atTech, I'm sorry to hear things are this rough but glad that it looks like things may be alright.

If there's anything you and your family need, I'm sure this board would be glad to help, if we can, just let us know.
Just listening and giving me a place to talk and vent is great. The people on these boards have proven time and time again how supportive they can be, I have no doubt that everyone would jump in and help. My family is very fortunate to have the support that we have.
 
Keeping you, your daughter, and your whole family close in thought and prayer. Let us know if we can do anything at all for y’all. Thank you for keeping us posted. Lots of people in this community care about you and we are cheering hard for you.
 
I agree that mental health has such a stigma attached to it that it makes it challenging for individuals to seek the help they need. I retired from the Navy in September of 2023, for those who don't know. I was diagnosed with major depressive disorder with anxious distress in 2017. I struggled alone for fear of losing my security clearance. The impetus for my seeking help was losing one of my sailors to suicide. My department Chief and I (one of a handful of ride-or-die buddies) struggled to cope, let alone deal with a division of 140 Sailors trying to come to terms with the loss. I was extremely fortunate to have a fantastic CO who gave us everything we asked for and stuff we didn't know we needed. We had a tremendous counselor on base, and the different service Chaplains all chipped in to help us through that difficult time. Once I sought the help I needed, I became a huge advocate for open and honest discussions with all of my Sailors. I never hid my diagnosis or my struggles and constantly reminded them that seeking help was a sign of strength, not weakness. UNCatTech, I feel for you and your family. Meeting Tim's (my Sailor) family was the most challenging thing I've ever had to do. The main problem is that there are not enough trained and licensed counselors to cope with the growing number of people who need help. The Navy was so overwhelmed that they began to refer us out in town, but the number of visits was limited because of obvious financial constraints. Now that I'm retired, the challenges of seeking help have only multiplied, and few individuals have accepted TriCare for their services. I count myself among the fortunate ones in that I have a great support staff of Sailors and friends from high school who are always willing to talk or lend a hand when needed.
 
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