Question for parents that have sent their kids to college

mpaer said:
Yea I graduated in 1972 from a High School in Wisconsin. I went to the U in Madison as we called it . Never had seen it-literally took a greyhound bus then a taxi to the Dorm
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Lucky for you Madison kicks ass. At least it does 40-50 years later.
 
donbosco said:
Is your assertion that Core Curriculum (we used to call it General College) should not be a consideration?
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I think so. I didn't get much from drama 16, rocks4jocks, spanish2xx, Portuguese literature, History xyz (demise of the Soviet Union), the archeology or anthro courses , afam101, etc in terms of prep for the work world. Afam101 was the most interesting from this list, but didn't help me professionally.

I'm not even sure if they made me that much more well-rounded as a person, though some of that could be self-inflicted due to choosing classes that weren't 8am and seemed easier grade-wise.

For practical and cost-efficient purposes I could have just gone to coding camp or some community college with comp sci courses. That said, I loved a lot about my 4 yrs at Carolina and wouldn't redo much.
 
Charlotte1204 said:
Granted, this was back in the ice ages (or 1993), but I applied to UNC and accepted without ever setting foot on campus. It already checked so many boxes -- big state school, noted journalism school, great sports. They didn't have to sell me on it at all. lol Plus, college visits weren't really a thing where I grew up (rural town in southern Virginia). Half my class didn't even go to college.

Obviously, things are different now and I'm now a part of the middle class, and college visits are what we do. My son is just a freshman in high school, so it will be interesting. I think he is more suited to the UNCG's and UNC-Charlotte's of the world. And after the mountain of loans I took out to come to UNC out of state, he will remain in state whether he likes it or not. Plus, he has a different learning style and it's really important that we find a good match for him. Hopefully, college visits will help with that.
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I had never been to North Carolina prior to arriving on campus.
 
gregh1 said:
I think so. I didn't get much from drama 16, rocks4jocks, spanish2xx, Portuguese literature, History xyz (demise of the Soviet Union), the archeology or anthro courses , afam101, etc in terms of prep for the work world. Afam101 was the most interesting from this list, but didn't help me professionally.

I'm not even sure if they made me that much more well-rounded as a person, though some of that could be self-inflicted due to choosing classes that weren't 8am and seemed easier grade-wise.

For practical and cost-efficient purposes I could have just gone to coding camp or some community college with comp sci courses. That said, I loved a lot about my 4 yrs at Carolina and wouldn't redo much.
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You seem to be viewing this solely as vocational training.
 
My daughter is a freshman at WCU this fall - she applied to 4 in state schools and several private colleges in Virginia - I think you should definitely visit all the schools - we visited all and then when she had narrowed it down we visited her top choices again - one thing I would definitely recommend is to eat at the dining hall when you visit - your kid most likely will eat most of their meals on campus so the quality of food can play a big role in the decision
 
GoHeelsweeeehoooo said:
My daughter is a freshman at WCU this fall - she applied to 4 in state schools and several private colleges in Virginia - I think you should definitely visit all the schools - we visited all and then when she had narrowed it down we visited her top choices again - one thing I would definitely recommend is to eat at the dining hall when you visit - your kid most likely will eat most of their meals on campus so the quality of food can play a big role in the decision
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Years ago I use to go there occassionally for work. At that time anyway (now it is all on line I guess ), all staff, HR , accounting etc would all participate in things like registration. So All staff directly , personally supported and interacted with students.. Cool idea..........
 
Thanks everyone for the feedback and if anyone else has any ideas or experiences, I doubt I'm the only one interested in it.
 
Our kids were total opposites when it came to college. We did several visits with our eldest, and she got it everywhere she applied (Coastal Carolina, Mississippi, UNC, and 3 or 4 more that I can't remember right off the top of my head). Thing is, she applied to UNC and didn't tell anyone - she was afraid she wouldn't get in. She got major $$ offers from Coastal and Mississippi, then the acceptance from UNC came in. She saw it and said "this is where I'm going and have always wanted to go", so we paid some $$ same day and off she went after graduation.

Our son told us when he was in middle school that he was going to go to Montreat to play soccer and major in cybersecurity. After his senior year, he went to Montreat, got some good $ to play soccer, majored in cybersecurity, and graduated in 3 years. And is making more $$ than all of us.

All that to say that one size definitely doesn't fit all, and for sure don't push your child to attend somewhere they don't want to go. You may have 3 generations of legacy at whatever university, but your child may hate the thought of going there, and for sure don't make them.
 
Charlotte1204 said:
Granted, this was back in the ice ages (or 1993), but I applied to UNC and accepted without ever setting foot on campus. It already checked so many boxes -- big state school, noted journalism school, great sports. They didn't have to sell me on it at all. lol Plus, college visits weren't really a thing where I grew up (rural town in southern Virginia). Half my class didn't even go to college.

Obviously, things are different now and I'm now a part of the middle class, and college visits are what we do. My son is just a freshman in high school, so it will be interesting. I think he is more suited to the UNCG's and UNC-Charlotte's of the world. And after the mountain of loans I took out to come to UNC out of state, he will remain in state whether he likes it or not. Plus, he has a different learning style and it's really important that we find a good match for him. Hopefully, college visits will help with that.
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Interesting. I was also Class of 93 for high school. Came from small town Oregon, where half my graduating class didn't even apply to higher education... and probably half that did, only "applied" to the local community college in our home town. Granted, my mom's brother, father and grandfather were all college professors, so despite the town where I lived, there was never any doubt I'd go to college. My mom grew up on UNC campus, as my grandfather spent most of his career teaching there.
 
gregh1 said:
I think so. I didn't get much from drama 16, rocks4jocks, spanish2xx, Portuguese literature, History xyz (demise of the Soviet Union), the archeology or anthro courses , afam101, etc in terms of prep for the work world. Afam101 was the most interesting from this list, but didn't help me professionally.

I'm not even sure if they made me that much more well-rounded as a person, though some of that could be self-inflicted due to choosing classes that weren't 8am and seemed easier grade-wise.

For practical and cost-efficient purposes I could have just gone to coding camp or some community college with comp sci courses. That said, I loved a lot about my 4 yrs at Carolina and wouldn't redo much.
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It seems like you sought out every gut class UNC had to offer... and then you're criticizing UNC for not getting much out of those classes. A top university is not going to force you to make the most out of your time there... it's going to offer you the opportunity to take great classes with some of the preeminent minds in that field. If you choose not to take those courses... or took them and did the minimum possible to get the grade you wanted, that's on you.

It's not like high school where you more or less have a designed curriculum where every student is supposed to learn the same things. A university is as much or as little as you make of it from an academic standpoint. There is a floor based on the bare minimum you need to graduate... and a ceiling that's as high as your motivation, work ethic and raw intelligence can take you.
 
NYCBlueBlood said:
It seems like you sought out every gut class UNC had to offer... and then you're criticizing UNC for not getting much out of those classes. A top university is not going to force you to make the most out of your time there... it's going to offer you the opportunity to take great classes with some of the preeminent minds in that field. If you choose not to take those courses... or took them and did the minimum possible to get the grade you wanted, that's on you.

It's not like high school where you more or less have a designed curriculum where every student is supposed to learn the same things. A university is as much or as little as you make of it from an academic standpoint. There is a floor based on the bare minimum you need to graduate... and a ceiling that's as high as your motivation, work ethic and raw intelligence can take you.
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I was a chemistry major pre med specifically because it hit the highest medical school requirements in the major. This allowed me to take a lot of history and other electives that I completely enjoyed. I can't say I got a minutes pleasure out of organic chemistry (that was part of my 'job' of being in school) but GV Taylors french revolution and Napoleon classes have stuck with me my entire life.

If kids don't think of college in some part as a 'job' to achieve bigger and better things going forward in their life they are probably better off actually having a job.
 
NYCBlueBlood said:
It seems like you sought out every gut class UNC had to offer... and then you're criticizing UNC for not getting much out of those classes. A top university is not going to force you to make the most out of your time there... it's going to offer you the opportunity to take great classes with some of the preeminent minds in that field. If you choose not to take those courses... or took them and did the minimum possible to get the grade you wanted, that's on you.

It's not like high school where you more or less have a designed curriculum where every student is supposed to learn the same things. A university is as much or as little as you make of it from an academic standpoint. There is a floor based on the bare minimum you need to graduate... and a ceiling that's as high as your motivation, work ethic and raw intelligence can take you.
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I said "some". So some gut, but not all. And the ones that were chosen for reasons other than to help lighten the load during a semester also didn't make me more well-rounded or job-ready. "Great" academics don't necessarily have bearing on things like personal development or "vocation" prep. But everyone is different.
 
Centerpiece said:
Here's one: I have a good friend whose son got a scholarship to attend UNC - and his very first semester (starting NOW) he's going to Scotland for his very first semester at Carolina. Was that ever a thing? I mean, the Junior year is when students usually take a semester abroad, correct? At least that's how it used to be when I was doing undergrad in the 1970's. But VERY FIRST SEMESTER ABROAD? Really? What happened to "all Frosh have to stay in a dorm on campus" until acclimated/oriented? Anybody heard of such a thing? Anybody get to do that? Know of someone who got to do that?
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I believe it is partly a strategy to get more kids accepted than spots available on campus for the Fall. Carolina knows there will be a certain number of kids who will not make it past the first semester. These kids who start abroad then slide in to fill those seats. Iirc, the students select that they are or are not ok with starting this way during the application process.
 
TitanNC said:
I believe it is partly a strategy to get more kids accepted than spots available on campus for the Fall. Carolina knows there will be a certain number of kids who will not make it past the first semester. These kids who start abroad then slide in to fill those seats. Iirc, the students select that they are or are not ok with starting this way during the application process.
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It's also a way of admitting students whose stats aren't quite as high. The stats of incoming students that schools tout are only for kids that start in the fall.

My son was admitted to Northeastern University but to their Oakland, CA campus. After that first year he moved to the main campus in Boston.
 
I'm going to throw this out there. I had a conversation this past week with my 29 yo. daughter. She had a tough time getting her degree, despite being of above average intelligence. (she was diagnosed with ADHD after she graduated, although we suspected it earlier). She said she would have been better off not going to college straight out of high school, and I kind of get the sentiment. I look back on my path and wish I had taken a year or two between high school and college to get some idea of what I wanted to do. Instead, I took 2 years off after attending a school 8 miles down the road for 2 years. I worked for two years in a textile mill, in a pizza restaurant, and in a food lab ( where we minced up small and cheap shrimp and molded them into large, expensive shrimp shaped nuggets) and I was ready to go back to school and really buckle down after that eye opening experience.

I'm not saying that to suggest you should discourage your daughter from going straight to college. Only to say that for some (many?) kids, a year or two doing public service work, or working for hourly wages would do them wonders as far as motivation and focus.
 
sleehrat1955 said:
I'm going to throw this out there. I had a conversation this past week with my 29 yo. daughter. She had a tough time getting her degree, despite being of above average intelligence. (she was diagnosed with ADHD after she graduated, although we suspected it earlier). She said she would have been better off not going to college straight out of high school, and I kind of get the sentiment. I look back on my path and wish I had taken a year or two between high school and college to get some idea of what I wanted to do. Instead, I took 2 years off after attending a school 8 miles down the road for 2 years. I worked for two years in a textile mill, in a pizza restaurant, and in a food lab ( where we minced up small and cheap shrimp and molded them into large, expensive shrimp shaped nuggets) and I was ready to go back to school and really buckle down after that eye opening experience.

I'm not saying that to suggest you should discourage your daughter from going straight to college. Only to say that for some (many?) kids, a year or two doing public service work, or working for hourly wages would do them wonders as far as motivation and focus.
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I wish I had done the same thing. I pitched it to my dad and he was terrified that I wouldn't go back If I took a gap year or two but I knew I would. I know I was much better and more engaged in grad school in my late twenties than I was as an undergrad in my late teens.
 
sleehrat1955 said:
I'm going to throw this out there. I had a conversation this past week with my 29 yo. daughter. She had a tough time getting her degree, despite being of above average intelligence. (she was diagnosed with ADHD after she graduated, although we suspected it earlier). She said she would have been better off not going to college straight out of high school, and I kind of get the sentiment. I look back on my path and wish I had taken a year or two between high school and college to get some idea of what I wanted to do. Instead, I took 2 years off after attending a school 8 miles down the road for 2 years. I worked for two years in a textile mill, in a pizza restaurant, and in a food lab ( where we minced up small and cheap shrimp and molded them into large, expensive shrimp shaped nuggets) and I was ready to go back to school and really buckle down after that eye opening experience.

I'm not saying that to suggest you should discourage your daughter from going straight to college. Only to say that for some (many?) kids, a year or two doing public service work, or working for hourly wages would do them wonders as far as motivation and focus.
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A little different but I definitely benefitted by taking several years off between college and law school. Sometimes we need to emotionally mature before the next big thing.

TBH, though, a lot of folks who say they are taking time off before the next level of educational attainment never seem to go back.
 
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