Mental health...

[finesse]

Come on, dude. I mean, that's fine and all and I'm sure finesse can give you some pointers (and maybe others) but that is not a substitute for an anti-anxiety medication.

Maybe pointers but not recommendations.

The closest I'd come is to say that for me, pot works better than most things as anti anxiety medication and there's a lot of bias behind that statement.

 

[Ramrouser]

I have always wanted to take a coast to coast train ride. But then I go on the Amtrak website and check out the price of room with a bed and my ardor for such a trip is tamped down for a couple of months.

What about a Trans Canada trip? It looks like a decent trip with great scenery.

Agree Amtrak is a terrible option for a coast to coast trip. Maybe NO to Chicago.

 

[finesse]

What about a Trans Canada trip? It looks like a decent trip with great scenery.

Agree Amtrak is a terrible option for a coast to coast trip. Maybe NO to Chicago.

But all the towns and people seem
To fade into a bad dream
And the steel rail still ain't heard the news
The conductor sings his songs again
The passengers will please refrain
This train got the disappearing railroad blues
Good night, America, how are you?
Say, don't you know me? I'm your native son
I'm the train they call the City of New Orleans
I'll be gone 500 miles when the day is done

 

[superrific]

Maybe pointers but not recommendations.

The closest I'd come is to say that for me, pot works better than most things as anti anxiety medication and there's a lot of bias behind that statement.

Yeah, I was kidding. Just giving you props.

 

[NYCBlueBlood]

Sounds like you've started excreting a GLP-1! Hook yourself up with a blood draw and a filter and make some serious cash on the black market!

Again I am left with silly advice. The more you think about it, the more agony it will cause you. The more anxious you are, the more likely it is that you will communicate with her poorly. So just relax. drum roll. But seriously, you've got to break yourself out of the doom loop. Having been there myself, I know it's really hard to do. One good way is to stop thinking about it. But then, if you're successful, you'll pat yourself on the back and whoops, you're thinking about it again. It's a conundrum.

Here's a thought. I apologize to everyone for volunteering them, but I wonder if might help for you to consult the board before sending texts. Or when interpreting texts. It's not that anyone here knows your life better than you, but there's such a thing as the wisdom of crowds. It's possible that everyone together will know what to do better than you. And maybe there are people who have lived through something similar and might offer an analysis or some useful thoughts. Obviously if you don't feel comfortable doing that (I'm imagine you typing, not screenshotting), don't. It's just a thought.

And I will sit that process out not because I don't care, but because I'm pretty bad at interpreting text messages and knowing how text messages will be interpreted. You don't want my advice on this issue, lol.

In situations like this, I find it wise to write out my text, walk away for an hour or so, then come back and reread it. Writing things and hitting send when you're in a bad place, generally leads to things getting worse.

 

[UNCatTech]

In situations like this, I find it wise to write out my text, walk away for an hour or so, then come back and reread it. Writing things and hitting send when you're in a bad place, generally leads to things getting worse.

I wish I had that option when talking to my manager.

Maybe I could say: "I need time to process this before I respond, because an immediate response of fuck you will probably result in a negative opinion of my position regarding this subject.

 

[NYCBlueBlood]

I wish I had that option when talking to my manager.

Maybe I could say: "I need time to process this before I respond, because an immediate response of fuck you will probably result in a negative opinion of my position regarding this subject.

I definitely developed this habit from work. NEVER EVER send a work email when you are annoyed.

Early in my career I always had somebody else read it first before I hit send... now I just type it up and walk away for a bit. Then when I come back I hit delete and write the email I know I should write.

Also as a general rule, if I'm annoyed then I always pick up the phone and call. Email does not provide the nuance you need for a situation where you're upset. Always discuss live. Email/ texts always escalate when you're upset.

Also better to not have things in writing if they escalate anyway...

 

[UNCatTech]

I definitely developed this habit from work. NEVER EVER send a work email when you are annoyed.

Early in my career I always had somebody else read it first before I hit send... now I just type it up and walk away for a bit. Then when I come back I hit delete and write the email I know I should write.

Also as a general rule, if I'm annoyed then I always pick up the phone and call. Email does not provide the nuance you need for a situation where you're upset. Always discuss live. Email/ texts always escalate when you're upset.

Also better to not have things in writing if they escalate anyway...

Yes, I've had someone whom I could ask to read things before I send them, but he's leaving at the end of May.

I feel like I'm losing so much right now. Wife's leaving, my manger/ friend is leaving, the work that I once enjoyed doing, is gone.

Am of those are being replaced by uncertainty.

 

[NYCBlueBlood]

Yes, I've had someone whom I could ask to read things before I send them, but he's leaving at the end of May.

I feel like I'm losing so much right now. Wife's leaving, my manger/ friend is leaving, the work that I once enjoyed doing, is gone.

Am of those are being replaced by uncertainty.

Ugh, I'm sorry. That's a lot to deal with all at once. You should go have a midlife crisis... buy a convertible sports car, date somebody 20 years younger than you!